I am sitting here staring at blank pages. I have been blocked for bout 2 months now. TWO months. i have been trying to write the last 3rd of this stupid script. My words and thoughts are clearly fuckin with me. This thing has been in development for 2.5 years now. EVERYTHING has changed from the characters names to what the hell i am even writing about.

Audition

Finally got an audition. It is for....You guessed it a big black bad guy. 1000 ways to die. I have auditioned for them once before. This will be the first audition that my new agent has gotten me. a positive sign. I didn't submit myself for this audition. My other wonderful aka useless agent never me an audition that I didn't submit myself for.

Honestly I need the cards to fall into place. i will get into that at a later date. 

Learning the art of networking AKA slutting myself out. AHHH yes being a whore is so worth it SMH.

Class

It's easy to work hard when your motivated and energized. But u will not always be that. Like now i don't wanna go to class. Just wanna sit here and talk to my pillow. But gotta go.

New Agent

My goal was to get a new agent to rep me across the board. Got it. Now time to get to work. She wants me to put on a little size and get more cut. Which is easier than what i was doing which was losing weight and getting cut. I figure i can put on about 10 lbs of muscle in the coming months. Drop down to around 8 percent body fat (that's the hard part)... All work and no Beer makes Noa something something *from simpsons.* I have to also get new head shots. I hate taking pictures. Also hate spending money on the pictures.

Next goal is to look for a Manager. Don't know where to start with that one. But screw it.

writing

I have been writing his screenplay for more than 2 years now. It has changed a million and one time. I feel like it can be an amazing idea. Issue is thAt I go through these pockets where I can not think of. Damn thing to write. The characters seem to entertained by laughing at my less than expedient progress. The characters r developed I have a beginning and end and 3 acts. Issue is that I want this to be perfect. So I will write and think "this isn't a classic" become frustrated and put it down for months on end.

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A Fighter was asked. "what do you believe in?"
His response was "I believe in myself."
This is so simple but so perfect. This is what i will live by. This is what i will die by